My journey through life on South Dakota Ranch
I’m on my way to San Antonio, Texas this morning but figured I might brighten a day or two even though I’m not around. So enjoy!
Here’s hoping y’all all have a great weekend! I will be back at some point, maybe sooner, rather than later and there will be pictures and stories I’m sure. I’m going to get to meet my new nephew, Raleigh this weekend, and I’m so very excited!
Happy Trails!
Please let me know what you think. But only as long as you love it. Merry Christmas!
Yesterday (2.17.2010) I buried my friend. A girl that was the same age as me. A woman who was a wife. A mother. She left behind a 7yo daughter. There were so many stories told. So much that was simply put, just Jaime.
I’m sure this isn’t the right way to describe the day, but it was interesting to say the least. Many of us who had grown up together were reunited. I got to see people who I hadn’t seen in 14 (or more) years! See what they look like now (some of them I had trouble recognizing), how many children they have, what they’re doing with their lives. We have a pastor (who presided over the funeral services and did a superb job, I might add). There’s some folks in construction; one in the oil fields, one going back to school to become an architect; Marketing/Management and stay at home moms. Then there’s me, still rodeoing and pursuing horses as my passion.
In talking with my friends, so many of them didn’t remember things that we did to each other- it was specifically evident that all these things we saw as a big deal, things that caused us strife all those many years ago were so trivial- so meaningless in the scheme of things. There were even apologies. I love that good friendships transcend time- it seems that time stands still and you can go years without seeing someone and in a blink of an eye, you’re re-united and you pick up where you left off. To me it’s a sign of security- of realizing that you love/liked/enjoyed this person’s company and what may/or may not have happened 10, 12, or 14 years ago doesn’t matter. What does matter is that you are still around to enjoy this life. To make the most of every minute, which is what our friend Jaime did.
I was thinking on my way home how if I’d known at 17 what I know now, life would have been so much easier. But you know what? I wouldn’t appreciate that knowledge. I think that if you’ve got half a brain you realize that with knowledge and age and experience comes wisdom. My friend Brandi and I discussed the fact that an 18 year old boy really has nothing good on his mind when he’s interested in a 16 year old girl! What business does he have with her? At 16, of course you think it’s cool that an 18 year old boy is interested in us, and our parents are just so old and so uncool because they’re not cool with it; rightly so. And now, we’re concerned about it. Funny how time and perspective and age change things.
Yesterday was good for me, not because we said goodbye to someone that was too young to die, but because it renewed me. Because each day we get to live is a gift from God. We aren’t guaranteed tomorrow, so we should make the most of each day. So I will ask each of you to remind me of that when I get down on myself, or get in the dumps about something. And I will try to do the same for you. We can’t forget that This Moment, is our life.
I have been writing a lot of music lately- I guess it’s my new Taylor Guitar- or maybe the fact that it’s been raining and/or so ridiculously wet that I need to borrow Noah’s Ark to get around! I mean, I understand the need for rain, I really do, but seriously couldn’t it pace itself?
So in while I’m stuck indoors and unable to ride unless I want to get soaked, and frankly, unless I have a good reason to be soaked, like delivering a calf, or moving cows or some other worthy cause, I’m not venturing out to be chilled to the bone by Mother Nature.
Regardless, here’s another original piece.
Lyrics will be at the bottom if you want to read along! Thanks for listening!
It’s a cloudy rainy day outside; It’s comin’ down in buckets.
The horses are grazing away; I’m dreamin’ you were here.
I’m all alone. Far away from you
I need some sunshine, to chase away these blues
So I’ll wish you could kiss me goodnight, On the forehead
I’ll wish you could kiss me goodnight, Cause I’m the love of your life
Kiss me goodnight; I miss you, my darling
Chasing my dreams, has me far away from you;
I know you miss me, but sometimes it’s all I can do
I’m alone, Far away from you
needing some sunshine to chase my dream
So I’ll wish you could kiss me goodnight, on the forehead
I’ll wish you could kiss me goodnight, cause I’m the love of your life
Cowboy, Kiss me goodnight
Cowboy, Clear away all my fears
Cowboy, Clear away all the doubts
Kiss me goodnight.
This is my first ever real Vlog- as I haven’t had a web-cam until now. I’m certain every one of y’all is excited. Now you’ll be forced to see vlogs of me, but the web-cam makes it easier to share my music, which is exactly what this blog is all about. I apologize in advance for the crappy sound; I’m not sure what exactly is going on with the web-cam. But I promise I’ll figure it out.
In the meantime, here’s the video. You’ll find the lyrics below.
Thanks for listening!
Love, Me
Me and my friend Kristen
I have been meaning to write about this, because it’s something I struggle with occasionally, and I’d like very much to not struggle with it at all (it’s one of my goals for 2010). I don’t recall if I’ve always been this way, or if the abusive men in my life have reprogrammed me to believe that I’m not worthy. And I do realize, dear readers, that I have still not blogged my way through Vegas. We’re in a snow/wind storm today, so this might be the prefect day to wrap that up. I digress.
It’s not even so much that I don’t feel worthy, though at times that’s true. It’s more that I struggle with thinking I’m better than someone else, or comparing myself to other people. I do it, so I figure everyone else is comparing me. I won’t get in to who/why I feel the need to I compare myself, but it’s not generally healthy. I also find myself thinking things like, “Omg. How tacky was their Christmas Decorating?” Or “What were they thinking when they decided this looked good together?” Or, “I’ve got so much better taste and more style than such and so.” Now that isn’t to say that there are people that certainly have the *eye* for design and decorating but because I have that talent, doesn’t make me better than someone who lacks that artistic ability, right? Because certainly those people have good qualities that I may not have. Though with that said, there are people that need help- or there wouldn’t be interior designers and HGTV. Speaking of which, my dad told me this past week that my mother thinks I should apply to be on Design Star. That’s two people now who’ve said that. Darnit, I’ve digressed. Again.
What this boils down to, is a Twitter conversation from this week. Funny, right? I was asking if any other women struggle with thinking they’re good enough; or compare themselves to others like I do. I sometimes find myself in the mindset that life is a competition. But it isn’t. Or is it? Sometimes I find it hard to like the skin that I’m in and think that I have to prove to everyone that I’m beautiful and talented and smart. When in the scheme of things it probably doesn’t matter.
So as we were having this 140 character conversation, it was brought to my attention that I should write a song about how I feel. I thought it was a smashing idea, so I present to you the lyrics for Girl Envy. I hope to have time to film the melody and me singing/playing it later this week. But if I don’t get to it this week, never fear, I’ll get to it. Eventually.
Girl Envy
She’s got red hair.
Perfect Nails.
Always accessorized to the nines.
She’s got pretty shoes.
Great Cowboy boots.
Can fill out any dress just right.
Why oh why can I not be her?
Have the men droolin’ down the street?
Why oh why can I not be her?
She’s the best lookin’ girl in the county?
She’s got flower beds.
Perfectly coiffed.
Gorgeous Leather couches, meant
to annoy.
She got a perfect tan.
Model thin arms.
Even in the rain, she still looks fine.
Why oh why can I not be her?
Have the men droolin’ down the street?
Why oh why can I not be her?
She’s got the best lookin’ yard in the county!
Well this skin, that I’m in,
is what God Gave me.
It’s what I got, so I should learn to love me.
‘Cause I got
Blond Hair.
A pretty smile.
Don’t kill my flowers, and I’m nice.
I’ve got a good brain
A talent for art
And a guy who loves me…
So why oh why would I wanna be her?
I’ve a got a guy droolin’ down the street?
Why oh why would I wanna be her?
I’ve got what I need, and more than I deserve.
Why oh why would I wanna be her?
I’ve got the best guy in the whole wide world?
Why oh why would I wanna be her?
I’ve got what I need and more than I deserve.
So there you have it ladies and gentlemen. A song about Girl Envy. I certainly can’t be the only person on the planet that struggles with this can I? Let me know how you have overcome this!
Love,
Me
PS. There is a massive amount of snow blowing around outside right now. It looks like Antarctica outside again today!
I promised this last week but it didn’t come to fruition as I was too busy getting ready to ship heifers on Monday.
So without further ado, here I am, singing Heart Like Mine, by Miranda Lambert (my favorite).
For you new readers, I’ve recently taken up playing the guitar. I grew up in a musical family and started piano at 6 and was singing in church when I was younger than that, if memory serves me correctly. Lacee has decided that my singing rocks, and she has asked for more, so now you shall receive. I made Lacee wait too long for it anyway, so I may go and film another one while I’m in this mode. I hope you enjoy it.
Six days ago, I picked up a guitar. Prior to that, I’d picked up a guitar maybe twice. Never to do more than strum the strings that sound funny on their own. It always hurt my fingers to play, and while I thought it would be neat to know how, I have always had a piano to pound around on should I feel the need to exercise my musicality. Learning was never a priority.
I have played the piano (mostly classical music) since I was about 4. I got really good, and then went to college, where, since then, I’ve played sporadically at best. My mother is a music teacher; her mother was a music teacher. But it’s different now. I don’t have a piano here. Mine is in Texas in my mother’s classroom. Can I have it soon, please? As an aside, that is/was my grandmother’s piano- the one my mother learned to play on. That I am going to get it is super cool. I’ve even got a place for it in the new house.
With the help of Zach I taught myself how to play a few chords on the guitar this week. I was pounding out a G chord, a D chord, and a C chord and before I knew it, well…After the Spin last week, I was told that I should put those lyrics to a melody and make it a country song. Little did you people know I’d actually do it!
This week, our Spin was about a song that has affected my life. At this point, I’m sure it’s obvious that I am writing about mine. Let me introduce you to my song, “Nine Miles”. Life has changed for me so much for the better since I moved to this place that I talk about in the song. I am more confident. Less stressed out. Happer than I thought it possible for a human to be. I had to make a few lyric changes to make it work for the melody. But it’s pretty close to the original. Please don’t be too hard on me. I’m by no means good at playing. YET. Give me a couple months, Ok, folks? Hopefully you’ll enjoy it.
Thanks to my mom and to Zach for helping me in this endeavor.Y’all rock!
Nine miles down a gravel road,
Is a place that we call home.
Where we live and laugh and love;
Where the grass grows tall and green.
Nine miles down a gravel road,
Is a place that we call home.
The river and wind flow through it,
The skies are clear; the air is clean.
Nine miles down a gravel road,
Is a place that we call home.
Summer smells of fresh cut hay;
Of sun and wind and beef.
And when the road you’re taking
gets to hard to bear;
There’s a place I know and you’re
always welcome there-
It’s…Nine miles down a gravel road,
To a place that we call home.
Where there’s horses all around,
Where family abounds
Nine miles down a gravel road,
Is a place that we call home.
Where we live, and laugh and love
in a small house on the hill…
Nine miles down a gravel road.
