This will be post 450 on my blog. Sad that it’s one about how depressed I am.
Tex first and most…
And I guess I might should fill everyone in- I had spotty, at best, cell service where I was last week. I knew Tex was going in to the clinic for them to look at him. But I didn’t know what they’d find. I knew they were running a blood test. But the calls that were made to me to ask me what I wanted to do about him didn’t make it through to me. My dad had to make the call. My sister couldn’t do it.
I got back today; Higgins has been looking for his friend. That breaks my heart. I’m about to find myself staring at this screen through tears. For up until now, I’ve been too busy and surrounded by too many people to catch my breath long enough to contemplate the event of his death. Oh, I’ve cried sure. I cried myself to sleep Friday night. Branding was Saturday and I just didn’t have time to think too much. That was a 16 hour day. I cried that night too. I cried yesterday. I cried today. I’m crying now.
I can’t fix it if I don’t know it’s broken *insert sob here*. He quit wanting to eat when it got hot. But he didn’t stop eating entirely. He ran and played and was still being his rambunctious self *insert sob here*. The vet said he was impacted for too long and it damaged his kidneys *insert sob here*.
I don’t have a big, red, dog to hug anymore *insert sob here*. He’s not around to sit on my foot *insert sniffle here*. He’s not around to wag his big tail at me and shake his ears anymore *insert sniffle here*. He can’t give me five, or ten, or play dead anymore *insert sob here*. He isn’t here to get his lips caught on his canines *insert teary-eyed smile here*.
I’m so sorry Texas.
Shuttle Second.
Doc called today and is referring her out to a surgical clinic. He says she’s way too sore, and that the joint is flushing clean, and that there isn’t any infection left and he’s puzzled. He wants to send her out to someone else that has the facility and tools to endoscope the joint so we can make sure he’s not missing something. It could be something as easy as just giving her room to roam and time to heal; or it might be more complicated than that. We don’t know *insert sniffle here*. I do know that she’s not here; I can’t ride her; and I’m minus one super pretty, red mare.
*sniffle*
*sniffle*
Sigh.
I feel your pain. I’m so very sorry you lost your Tex. And I hope your horse starts doing better soon.