I’m not going to show you video from last night’s barrel race. At least not the video of me. Kelsey made a really good run of 17.9 something in her youth run and ended up third. For me, it was just a disaster. I’m not sure why it fell apart like it did. But it did.
I guess I expect my horse to get better every week, regardless of whether or not I ride him like a fat girl or not. Regardless of what I do. And inevitably if I make a mistake, I don’t want to take responsibility for it. I want to blame him for not doing what I’ve been teaching him right when it’s not his fault. When chances are 99% that he did EXACTLY what I told him to do. I can (and did) throw out a week’s worth of good training on a run that doesn’t go like I thought it should. I can have, and do have second thoughts about doing things the way I’m doing them. I have doubts and don’t believe that I can make it work this way. When I have nights like I did last night, I get all pissy (and I was hormonal anyway, so that definitely doesn’t make it better), I think that I have no business riding/training horses. And then I wonder, really, how do you measure success? I want really badly to go to the NFR and run down the alley at the Thomas and Mack Center. But do I want that, because it will show the world that I really do know what I’m doing? Because shouldn’t I believe that I do know what I’m doing? And then I wonder, why would anyone send me a horse to ride, or want to buy a horse I’ve ridden/trained if I’ve never won anything big in my life? Why would anyone come to me for help, when I’m getting outrun by lots of other horses? I’m not getting any younger and at some point I may want to have a kiddo or two and that would crimp my goals. Maybe I’m just impatient. But I do wonder, how do you define success with your horse when you’re me? Ve? Stephie? Jilly? Zoe? Christine? Toni? Anyone?
I sent my horse to you because I watched SEVERAL horses melt in your hands at your clinic.
I sent my horse to you because you believed that he should be a solid horse before he became a barrel horse.
I've bought two horses solely based on what you think of them because I trust your judgement in horses and I know that you are looking for the longevity of the horse not just a smokin run.
No you haven't run at the Thomas and Mack, and perhaps you are getting outrun by horses that are no where near as broke as Gump . . .
But when all is said and done, if Gump never wins the NFR, he will be a horse that can and will have a life after barrel racing. I admire the fact that you put enough into him to ensure that fact. And that is why I'd send you another horse in a minute without any hesitation.
That is success.
I don't know what happened in your run last night. I do know it is probably not nearly as bad as you think it is.
In terms of stopping a horse at a gallop in the middle of the pattern, the question is not whether you can do it but whether you should or why you want to.
A trainer might see the need for that, but a jockey would not. And I would argue that once your horse is to the point that you are letting him really run the pattern, it's time to take off the trainer hat and put on the jockey hat and just ride him through it.
Then, when you get back home, put your trainer hat back on and work on the issues.
You are a GREAT trainer, very much for what you know and what you want your horses to be already. But more so because you want to learn more and you continue to grow in order to help your horses do the same.
For the time you have had with Gump and the issues he came to you with, you have to be more than proud of where you are today with him! With more time and more seasoning, things like whatever happened last night will happen less and less . . . and Gump will ge better and better.
and finally . . .
How many of those girls running at the Thomas and Mack acutally made their own horses? Very few. Most bought their horses from a trainer like you who took the time to make the horses and then let someone else claim the "success" . . .
There is no failure in what you do. What you do is the only reason many of them succeed.
And
Jeff Gordon, while a successful race car driver, does not build his own cars.
They are built, modified, and maintained by many unknown folks to you and I.
Are they not successful?
You have to decide what defines success for you and then adjust your program to meet that goal.
If you won't deem yourself successful until you have run at the Thomas and Mack . . . then it's time to start operating on a different agenda.
But if success means making a living doing what you love every day, making solid & sane horses, and improving every horse that you ride . . . you've already succeeded.
You're really making me curious as to what happened?? But I do agree with Ve that most of the other girls probably did NOT train their horses but instead just bought them. Why are you so hard on yourself lately?
What happened:
No rate at barrel one and we turned barrel two worse than what was going on last fall. In other words, we galloped a REALLY big circle around it! His head was up and there was little, if any collection. He cut me off going to barrel #1 in run #2 (so he didn't allow me to shape him and hold him where I want him.
As to the stopping, it's less about needing to do it, and more about knowing you can. It's about collection of a soft and round nature. If I can stop him in a run/from a run, and have him stop smooth, with his head down and soft, then I can get him to turn that same way, or slow him down if he gets going too fast. Should I ever need to use it? I figure probably not, but like Bo Hill says, I have vertical flexion if I want it, but I don't use it.
Heather-
I am really hard on myself all the time. I don't know why. But I am.
Jen, I know squat about horses. But I do know that you're a bad-ass trainer, and if I had a horse I'd send it to you.
As to this: I am really hard on myself all the time. I don't know why. But I am.
Think about that, Jen. Nobody else in the world is as hard on you as on yourself. Even God has more forgiveness for you than you have for yourself. If God is willing to tolerate your imperfections and forgive you, why do you choose not to do the same? Isn't God's standard enough, and if not – why?
Just food for thought. I'm glad you blogged 🙂
I had something prepared, but Ve beat me to it and said it better than I. 🙂
She nailed it on the trainer vs jockey comparision. You are going for long-term, Jen, just gotta be patient.
Sorry have not been on here lately…
I only want to run barrels, maybe poles. All my horses are sane!!! All will walk in and out of the alley and go from a dead run to a walk in the pattern. I want my horses broke, not to perform a certain task but to do what I ask when I ask. I do not care if a horse can drag its ass or spin a hole in the ground what I care about is doing exactly what I ask when I ask without question. This is hard for a horse to do. They give up all self perservation to you. I can ask a horse to turn a circle shaped and pretty(like you would a barrel) and then ask them to roll back over thier hocks. These are both turning but asked for differently. You can go gather cows or run barrels on my horses and I rarely gather cows because my horse are broke to do what I ask not to do something.
I think that is the real problem with most horse in all events is they are broke to do the same thing over and over, not just broke to do what they are asked. Even the horse that ride that are really hot, like Beau will do exactly what I ask whenever I asked and still be bouncing off the walls. Yeah they make mistakes like running past a barrel but I would rather one run a stride or two pasted then to turn before they are asked.
Success and Failure are relativent to only the person judging them.