So I was in Minnesota this weekend for a wedding- which we missed- due to Twin Cities traffic; and a not-so-good detour, compliments of the Garmon. The detour and the traffic meant we only made the reception.
Before I go further, I suppose I should tell you- I opted for the Merlot colored dress (complete with matching painted toes and fingers), with the gold shoes, and matching gold bag and I took the (fur) rabbit along for good measure. The weather was really pretty nice however, and it wasn’t necessary.
But this isn’t about those details, really. How we arrived at the reception and what I wore pales in comparison to the juicy details that you, dear reader, really want. I saw things at this wedding reception that I’ve seen, NOWHERE else. Ever.
Now before I go on this tirade, let me make it clear that I do not think I’m a better person than anyone else, nor do I think that people aren’t entitled to their own idea of fashion. Ok. I take that back- some people need serious help; there’s a reason there’s a show called *What NOT to Wear*. Some things are just plain out-dated; quirky; ridiculous or look bad- either by themselves or together. Some people have ZERO etiquette. Maybe it’s not on their radar. Maybe they don’t care. Either way, a woman attending a wedding in denim is just not cool. Maybe that’s because you just DON’T DO THAT in the South? Maybe it’s because I am the only person on the planet that thinks that’s not cool. Or maybe I just think I’m the fashion police. Regardless; I must share with you the fantastically crazy things I saw this Friday night.
1. The Fanny Pack- used as a belt. Ah yes! The lovely fanny pack; combined with the little black dress. What a combo! I get the not wanting to carry a bag- but you can still carry a small bag or even a wristlet, and still be free enough to dance the night away, as this woman did. And in fact, you can carry a small enough bag to hold a camera, ID, cash, and a credit card. Anyway. This particular woman was wearing panty hose with her dress. Which leads me to the second fashion faux pas.
2. Panty hose. I haven’t been surrounded by so much nylon since, well, since I can’t remember when. Maybe it’s a northern thing? I have no idea, as girls in Texas don’t wear nylons. Last I checked Carrie and the gang of SATC didn’t wear Nylons either, unless they were wearing fishnets, and/or closed toed shoes. But this night, I saw nylons with open toed, sandals. The kind of sandals you wear with capri pants, or a summer skirt. NOT the kind of sandals you wear with a cocktail dress. I saw this on about 5 women.
3. Shoe selection, ladies. Don’t wear casual shoes with a dressy dress. Puh-leaze? Ugh! When in doubt, please visit www.instyle.com.
4. Paint your damn toenails, ladies!!! All of the aforementioned women in open-toed shoes, who were wearing nylons, were sans toenail polish. Maybe I’m being extra hard on folks. Maybe I’m vain (I bet there’s at least one person out there that will think I am).
5. I also saw some questionable layering techniques. Try this on for size: a purple bohemian style shirt, worn with a denim mini, over a pair of black capris, capped off with black nylons. I kid you not. I KID YOU NOT!
6. There were men in jeans and t-shirts (I have video! of said man in T-shirt dancing the Macarana). Men in jeans and polos. I’m not altogether sure how I feel about that (jeans and a T should be completely unacceptable)- but I know that I absolutely do not like seeing women in jeans at a wedding. That one might be my own personal pet peeve.
Friday night made the first time ever, I’ve been somewhere that someone didn’t compliment me on my shoes, and I saw not one other girl that I could say, Ohmigod! She’s dressed so cute! To some degree it made me miss the city; since there I was constantly barraged with cuteness. No one here cares about cute, or designer shoes/bags/dresses and it drives me bananas. Can these women not take some pride? It makes me miss my friends. No one dresses up here, and I LOVE to dress up. I don’t want to be dirty and in jeans and boots all the time. I really don’t.
Ok. I am now tired. This sucked the life out of me to recall all this.
I am sorry you had such a disappointing fashion visit in the Twin Cities! I can’t say you’re wrong about fashions being a bit off here, though.
I went to get my first MN bikini wax (after going to the same wonderful waxer in Boston for many years) and was horrified, horrified! She had no idea what she was doing. I left, called my husband, and told him that we are SO NOT IN BOSTON ANYMORE! Do women here not WAX? I thought women everywhere wax? It’s like a non-fashion fashion statement.
Wow. Okay, firt of all, I think women in the North wear nylons WAY more than women in the south. In fact, I’m just in TN and I can’t recall the last time I saw nylons on someone (man or woman!).
And really? Jeans???? And that girl in the layers? WTF is that about???? And the Twin Cities is NORTH so I would ASSUME they would know better. But if I were there, I would have complimented you on your shoes and dress cause I bet you looked fabulous!
I’ve always heard that the prettiest women are in Texas…maybe that’s why we care so much about how we look. I will not go out of the house without makeup on.
You always look so cute even in jeans and a tank…just ask Dara. She always said mom didn’t she look cute today when we would come for a lesson. Some of Dara’s style today comes from seeing you on Saturdays for a lesson.
I bet a million that you even outshined the bride. Maybe the girls up there will take a hint and want to take a little pride in the way they look.
Yeah, I would have figured that women everywhere would wax too.
I would have figured, being near a bigger city, such as the Twin Cities, would have lead to more fashion conscious people. Apparently not.
Do these women not read Vogue? In Style? Elle? Allure? And anymore, not having the money to buy designer clothes isn’t even an excuse! You can buy a knock-off at Wal-mart these days!
I simply MUST see this video. Please post! Hopefully you caught a glimpse of some of these fashion feax paux on video as well!
Oh, I’m SO posting the video later today. It’s going up.
So I have come to two conclusions.
1. Women dont care about how they dress because a large about of outfit planning goes to planning on staying warm.
2. That I have several friends who are from the north and they know how to dress just fine. And cute!! So maybe its the group of people. As a group they do not find fashion as a important part of life. Really, when you work as hard as some of the people up there and freeze your ass off too, who cares what you put on just to have a good time. Its one less thing to be stressed out about. They just want to blow off steam and have fun with the people they love.
Its not a north/south thing…their are plenty of girls from the north that dress cute.
Ashlee is from ND and she dresses better than most movie stars. When we were at the barrel race there was lots of cute dressed girls. Its a group thing.
Kinda like roper girls are never dressed as cute as barrel racers.
Maybe some of us should take a lesson from them…The cover of a book does not make the story, it keeps it the pages together.
this is comming from a guys point of view, but i can tell you that i think nylons with open toed sandals are REALLY unattractive..
Slyde-
Thanks for giving us some input from the male perspective!
I’m glad I’m not the only one!
And Jill- most of those girls are really nice; it’s just a differing of priorities.
And Jill- most of those girls are really nice; it’s just a differing of priorities.
That's it exactly. You're not in "Dallas" anymore. SD is a waaaaaaay different place with a vastly different culture. If you ask me (and nobody has, so take my free advice for what's it's worth) I'd worry more about trying to integrate & assimilate myself into it rather than pick it apart and make an issue out of nobody meeting up to whatever expectations you might have had, whether you articulated them to those who surround you or not. Remember – you're essentially an outsider coming into their culture, not the other way around.
Just my wholly unsolicited two cents. Disregard & delete if desired.
And I meant absolutely zero of this as any kind of a shot at you whatsoever. I'm too chicken to move.
🙂
Ian-
I get what you’re saying, but I have zero desire to become 1. a slob and 2. someone with no etiquette.
Looking nice shows that you have some self -respect. No self respecting woman should show up at a wedding/wedding reception in something that looks like it should be worn on a camping trip.
Amen sister!
I told blw about the fanny pack and he said what wrong with that?
see what i have to deal with!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Mr t-shirt and jeans, ugly t-shirt at that…..
Oh and all that shit about the cover of the book…HA…coming from the girl who has to have matching polo wraps and nail polish….
sorry she has to go now and make me some food
where’s the video? It’s a must see for the fashion citation effect. Ian, can we not poke harmless fun at bad dress decisions on occasion (especially at a wedding) without it being about us as heartless human beings? come on…
The video is turned sideways- since I took it on my digital camera, and I can’t figure out how to turn it the right way! I can post it like that, but we’ll all get cricks in our necks straining to see it.
Eww. Seriously. Eww. People up north are so different*
different=weird
There is corn on the salad bar in Nebraska. CORN.
Really?????