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You are here: Home / life / The War: As Told by the Ranch Dogs

The War: As Told by the Ranch Dogs

August 19, 2009 by Shauna 4 Comments

“Shhhhhhh! You dumb boys need to hush up! I heard something!”

“MJ, why must you always be bossing us?” whispers Higgins the Papillon?

“Yeah. You’d think she owns this joint or something”, says Jake the English Shepherd.
“I’ve been around here longer than you!”

“Me too!” Chimes in Higgins.

“Oh for crying out loud, boys! I can’t hear a thing over your incessant chattering! I may be the youngest here, but the humans say I mind the best and that I’m smartest! Maybe you both should take lessons from me! Shhhhhhhhhh! There! There! I heard it! It’s a coyote for sure.”

It was true. In the distance you could hear the cries and howls of the coyotes. Recently, this has become a nearly nightly battle of volleying cries, between the ranch dogs and wild dogs of the wilderness here.

“Woooooof!” says MJ’s bass voice, as her long sleek corgie/border collie body slinks forward. “It’s on!”

“Arrrrffff, Aaaaaaarrrrrf, Whooooooof!” sounds Higgins’ high pitched toy-sized dog bark.

“Grrrruffff! Gruffff! Brrrrrrroooooooof!” yowls Jake tenor voice.

Again, the coyotes howl, though this time, they’re really close to the house.

“Jake! Higgins! You two go north and check out that side of the yard. I’ll go West and hold ’em off! We’ve got to protect the humans!”

More barking. More coyote whimpering. More barking. And Barking. And barking.

“Dogs! MJ! Higgins! Jake!”

“Crap. It’s Jenn. We should go see what she wants. Doesn’t she know we’re trying to keep her safe?”

“MJ, I’m sure she does, but we’re probably also keeping her awake. You know those crazy humans don’t sleep during the day like we do. They sleep at night, with the windows open. I’m sure we don’t ever bother my Zach. He isn’t really one to get bothered.”

“Don’t patronize me, Jake. I know exactly how they sleep. Grrrrrrrr… I sleep outside my Kelsey girl’s room!”

“MJ, you talk too much!”

“What! Me? Higgins! You’re the mouthiest dog I know when it comes to yapping and howling and such. You may not be bossy but you’re definitely a chatty Cathy when you see someone new, or when your Jenn appears for the first time. Don’t go telling me I talk too much!”

And with that, three dogs, with wagging tails arrive on the porch and are then locked up in the laundry room, so that I can get some sleep. And the war is left to be continued on another night.

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Comments

  1. GreenRanchingMom says

    August 19, 2009 at 2:13 pm

    Love It!! This same tale is told almost every night that I don't lock the group in the porch.

    One dog always sleeps outside, because he is very good about only barking if it is SERIOUS.

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  2. Tana & Tally says

    August 19, 2009 at 3:03 pm

    haha…understand completely.

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  3. Megan says

    August 20, 2009 at 1:23 am

    I totally heard that war when I was there. Sounds about right.

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  4. Bina says

    August 20, 2009 at 4:53 pm

    Jen, that is so freaking cute! I just LOVE it!

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